My "home meter" is picking up signals from too many places lately. The Dinkins' house is a wonderful place to stay right now. Even though I'll only be here for another month, it feels such a comfortable location near the city, but centered in the country. A year ago, as a college freshman, I forced myself to feel at home at North Greenville University. Tomorrow, I'll go "home" to Seneca for a week. I feel as if I am never really home.
And I am not.
Such feelings of "dislocation" are to be expected when one has never even visited, seen pictures or heard a sufficient discription of their real home-- in Heaven. My grandparents, who have always been strong and dedicated Christians, are aging quickly. They are beginning to tell their children that they "want to go home." The closest sensation that I can imagine is that of a very tired child waiting for his parent to arrive after a long day of preschool, pick him up, put him in the car to go home and have family time.
I feel that way much more often than I admit.
In anticipation of the three hours drive home, I made an iTunes playlist just for the occasion. It began with five songs, but quickly spread to 54, so I will only share the first five, in case you feel the desire to listen to a song about home because of this blog :
Home -Daughtry
"I'm going to the place where love and feeling good don't ever cost a thing. ... To the place where I belong, where your love has always been enough for me. ...The miles are getting longer, it seems, the closer I get to you....You always seem to give me another try. These places and these faces are getting old, so I'm going home. Be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it all, and then some you don't want."
Long Ride Home - Patty Griffin
"I've had some time to think about it, and watch the sun sink like a stone. I've had some time to think about you on the long ride home. "
Walk Back Home -Anthony Johnson
"A million miles to go, and a million more behind me. All I've done is take my time, and that's a shame.... My strength is almost gone. All I ask is for somewhere they know my name. ... If I had a chance, I'd walk back home."
Way Back Home - The Wreckers
"Somewhere in the country, there's a place where nobody knows your name..... Somewhere in the city, there's a face that makes it hard to stay."
Who Says You Can't Go Home - Bon Jovi
"I was running away from the only thing I've ever known... who says you can't go back? Been all around the world... there's only one place left I wanna go. Who says you can't go home?"
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